Mass Effect Parody CitadelA/N: The Following is a fanbase parody. Mass Effect and all of its properties are copyrighted to the Bioware company. Please support the official release.
Mass Effect: The Things that Need to be Parodied: Citadel
In Deep Space
A well-endowed Asari approached from behind to address Saren. "Apparently, there was an Alliance vessel on Eden Prime. It was under the command of Captain Anderson."
"And the Beacon?" Saren asked.
"One of the marines may have touched it."
Suddenly, the blue backdrop turns a harsh red, as Saren throws a tantrum much like the Bioware fans who were given an MMO instead of a real sequel. Just as Saren was about to hit the Asari, he stopped at the sight of her cleavage and calmed down.
"It pays to be beautiful." She spoke to herself.
Back on the Normandy
Commander Shepard awoke in a dizzy stupor. He found himself lying on a bed, his vision still blur
James Camerons Avatar reviewAvatar, a review
James Cameron's Avatar should not be confused with Nickelodeon's Avatar. James Cameron's Avatar is a sci-fi movie which promises to change movies forever. Bryan and Mike's Avatar is about the last Airbender who's destiny is to defeat the firelord and restore balance to the world. That version is being done by M. Night Shyamalan.
Yeah, I'm worried too.
Anyway, James Cameron has always been known for being a director of sci-fi, and a very good director at that. However, in 1997, he came out with the behemoth Titanic which threw everyone off, including the Academy.
Fans love the movie and haters continue to hate. Me? I thought it was okay.
Now, after more than a decade, he mark his return to theatres with the movie Avatar.
Controversy surrounds this movie like a plague. A giant amount of hype has been built up as has a giant amount of backlash. Look at 4chan, and you can see all the haters waiting to pounce on this movie, much like a cheetah pounces on fresh prey.
Mass Effect ParodyDisclaimer: The following is a parody. I do not own or claim to own the property Mass Effect. Mass Effect is a product of the Bioware company. Please support the official release.
A/N: In the Fanfiction world, there are two types of parodies. The first kind uses insightful wit to entertain an intelligent crowd. The other just throws in as many jokes he thinks are funny until one of them emits a slight chuckle. This is the later
A/N 2: Due to the short amount of time I have, I was not able to beta-read this properly. If anyone would like to volunteer their services, please leave a private message and I will get back to you as soon as possible.
Mass Effect: The Things that Need to be Parodied
As a lone figure watched from space, several men could be heard chatting in the background.
"Well, what about Shepard? He's mostly lived on Earth, but his parents served with the Alliance."
"I met them, lovely couple. You should try their recipe for Meatloaf."
"He handled that mission to Lost
Princess and The Frog reviewDisclaimer: I do not own, or claim to own Disney's The Princess and the Frog. The Princess and the Frog is copyrighted to Disney and its original copyright owners. Please support the official release.
Disney's The Princess and The Frog, a review
Snow White, Aurora, Cinderella, Ariel, Belle, Jasmine, Pocahontas, Mulan, and Giselle.
If you were a child in the 90's, well let's face it; if you were a child or a parent in any era, Disney princesses have affected the way you've grown up. The formula is a simple but repeating one; girl meets boy, Disney rewrites formula, songs are song, people come out happy. While there are tweaks and adjustments to the formula, it virtually remains the same, save a few exceptions.
And while these films are ripe for parody and satire, one can't deny their importance. Call Disney Princesses what you will, call them racist, call them sexist, call them canonically inaccurate to their original source material. Just don't call them unimportant. Each
Retro Review KotOR 2For years, George Clooney has always-
We interrupt this regularly scheduled movie review for a defense of a last generation videogame. All games referenced belong to their original owners.
Retro Review: KotOR II
Ah, Thanksgiving. A day to celebrate mass harvest, family and football. What better way to spend it than referencing a 5 year old game on the Xbox?
There's no denying that Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic was a great game. With a familiar setting, a good cast and an innovative gameplay system, it has won the hearts of many a Lucas fanboy alike. You played as a Republic soldier who must save the galaxy from an evil Sith Lord. Little did you know, that there was a terrifying secret that even you weren't aware of. So, with such a great game already out, what was LucasArts planning for the year afterwards?
In the winter of 2004, a sequel was released to be the successor of the KotOR franchise.
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II was a game many fans dismis
Twilight New Moon ReviewDisclaimer: The following review is highly controversial; please do not read if you get easily offended. The Twilight Saga is copyrighted to Stephanie Meyer and Summit Entertainment. You may support the series by buying the books.
The Twilight Saga: New Moon, a review
Twilight is many things to many people. To the dedicated it's a forbidden romance novel for the ages. To the critics, it is a piece of tripe that can only be enjoyed by 16 year old girls or somewhere near that demographic, I'm not sure. This, of course, has caused nothing short of riots, fights and the usual post war to occur.
But to me, Twilight is simply a story about alternate vampires. Such as I am, I am completely indifferent to it.
Let me explain the concept of indifference: Indifference means I don't really care whether the series succeeds or fails. To me, after watching the movie and reading the book, I am for the most part unchanged.
The first Twilight depicted Bella Swan who, after moving to the to
2012 a Movie Review2012: a Movie Review
If you watch a lot of movies, you notice a lot of bad directors have specific traits. Michael Bay adds lots of sex and violence in his films as well as lack of editing. Uwe Boll makes terrible adaptations of video game movies. Brett Ratner employs awful humor.
But Roland Emmerich is different. He likes to make disaster films. Whether it's aliens, Godzilla or Global Warming, Roland Emmerich likes to depict humanity at their worst and against numerous odds, they manage to become victorious.
Still, that doesn't excuse the quality of his films.
2012, based on the 'alleged' upcoming events of the year 2012, depicts Jackson Curtis (John Cusack) as failed book writer and failed father as he tries to bond with his children on a forced camping trip. However, he suspects there may be more to the large cracks in the earth and dried up Lake in Yellowstone. Before he knows it, the world is ending and he must survive.
2012 is not by any means a good movie. It often has pl
Paranormal Activity a reviewParanormal Activity a review
Just because I don't update often doesn't mean I'm dead.
Let's get one thing out of the way before I review this: I am not a horror buff. I am very unfamiliar with many of the conventions and patterns that surround the horror genre. In fact the only horror film I did see was The Final Destination. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm sure horror films weren't supposed to evict laughter or remind me of Tex Avery Cartoons.
Anywho, it takes a lot to be called the next "Blair Witch Project". It takes even more to knock Saw off of its #1 position. But what we have here is not only a very nice low budget film, but a film filled with scares and frights.
The film concerns Katie and Micah, a young couple that is being haunted on account that Katie always felt a presence by her. It is then revealed that some demon continues to haunt and torture her as Micah, skeptical at first, attempts to capture the beast on camera and make it go away.
I have to admit that
Astro Boy a reviewAstro Boy a review
The majority of you probably don't realize the influence Astro Boy has on the world of anime/manga, so allow me to elaborate.
Osamu Tezuka can be considered the Godfather of Anime if not the God. He revolutionized a medium so well with such classic stories such as Kimba the White Lion (which Disney ripped off), Princess Knight, Black Jack and Buddha. However, Astro Boy can be considered as good as any of the works mentioned above.
The original story of Astro Boy concerned a young boy named Tobio, dying in a car accident. Distraught by the loss of his son, Dr. Tenma creates a robot that will never die, and never age. However, years pass and Tenma is fed up with the fact that this robot boy cannot grow, so he sells him to the circus. Luckily, a kind scientist named Dr. Elefun saves Astro Boy and adopts him. Along the way, themes such as civil rights, injustice and robot sentience is explored.
So, does the movie hold up?
Quite well, surprisingly.
The movie shows